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Flying the Unfriendly Skies.
I
hope this month’s Lawyers Stink E-mail Newsletter finds you doing well and
enjoying a lawyer free day. Today I’d like to turn our attention towards
the turbulence affecting America’s airline industry - and we’re not just
talking about the rough air up above.
The skies of America’s airline industry are anything but hospitable these
days. Operational costs are up, profits (what profits?) are nonexistent,
fuel costs are going through the roof and labor problems seem to always be
looming on the horizon.
The entire airline industry, with the notable exception of Southwest
Airlines, has made losing money an art form. Since the deregulation of the
airline industry in 1979, a number of major carriers (including Eastern,
Braniff and Pan Am) have gone under while scores of other carriers have
filed for bankruptcy protection.
About the last thing the airlines needed were a pack of litigation crazed
lawyers looking to score some nice pocket change - but that’s exactly what
they got.
Some of the lawsuits filed by airline chasing lawyers include the
following:
Economy class syndrome. Airlines are bracing themselves for lawsuits being
brought by hundreds of passengers over the condition known as deep vein
thrombosis (“DVT”). DVT, now commonly known in legal circles as “economy
class syndrome” since this condition allegedly tends to afflict passengers
on long haul flights, occurs when a blood clot forms due to hours of
immobility and cramped seating.
Once the passenger leaves the plane, the blood clot may become dislodged
and then travel to a vital organ and have a deadly result. Lawyers are
citing that airlines have known about this problem for years and have
failed to adequately warn their passengers. There’s the key to the piggy
bank. Lawyers looking to win millions always claim that the big company
knew about the problem and failed to correct it (remember the cigarette
lawsuits?).
Is the evidence conclusive? Of course not. Does that matter to the lawyers
looking hovering over the airline industry.? What do you think? These
lawsuits have the potential for massive pay-outs, since the airlines have
deep pockets to pick. In
It’s Time to Wake Up and Smell the Lawyers, we
examine how money grubbing lawyers always gravitate towards the deep
pocketed companies. No big surprise here.
Toxic air onboard. Another hotbed of lawsuit activity concerning the
airline industry involves toxic air in the passenger cabin. Airlines and
airplane manufacturers are getting hit with a flurry of “toxic air”
related lawsuits.
Various lawsuits brought by flight attendants allege that some airlines
and the companies that manufactured the aircraft have known (bingo!) that
the MD-80 and DC-9 aircraft have design flaws that make it easy for
leaking chemical fluids to get sucked into the auxiliary power unit (a
small turbine engine used to generate electricity and circulate cabin air
before takeoff) and then mix with the cabin air. Naturally, the defendants
deny the claims.
After a group of Alaska Airlines flight attendants garnered a $725,000 out
of court settlement regarding the claims, Boeing and Honeywell were next
on the hit list. The fun had just begun.
Let’s lighten the tone by reviewing a few goofy lawsuits filed against the
airline industry.
A man, traveling aboard U. S. Airways, was taking a snooze when the plane
landed in Birmingham, Alabama. Somehow the crew managed to leave him on
the plane. When he awoke from his slumber, the man claimed it was really
dark and he didn’t know if he was dead or alive. He sued for fright and
other harms.
A Delta Airlines passenger won $1.25 million for “landing trauma” after a
terrifying emergency landing en route to Cincinnati. Her lawyer contended
that the episode caused her to suffer post-traumatic stress syndrome
(there’s another one of those syndromes again) and aggravation of her
pre-existing depression. The judge ruled that her terror during landing
led to physical changes within the brain and that “could” be defined as an
injury.
A government employee sued Air Canada for more than $500,000 because he
could not order a 7-Up in French. During a flight, the man ordered a 7-Up
in French and the flight attendant couldn’t understand the order.
Eventually the man ended up with a Sprite. After a heated argument that
ultimately required the local police to meet the plane upon arrival, the
passenger sued over the language dispute (I’m not quite sure how the
argument went since communication appears to have been the problem in the
first place). Afterward, the man said he wanted Air Canada to apologize
for not offering services in French and to toss him some pocket change for
his trouble.
A judge ruled that Southwest Airlines did not unlawfully discriminate
against one of its passengers when the airline required the passenger to
purchase a second seat on one of its flights. The passenger tipped the
scales at over 300 pounds.
A few days earlier, an official agency in Canada recommended that airlines
be forbidden to charge their highly obese passengers for a second seat if
a excessively corpulent passenger required one. This recommendation was
based on the grounds that an highly overweight condition should be counted
as a disability entitled to compensation. Twinkie anyone?
If you’re a member of American Airlines’ frequent flyer program, you may
have received a class action settlement notice in the mail. The brouhaha
centers around the airline’s decision to raise the point level requirement
for a free coach class ticket from the previous 20,000 mile level to
25,000. Good grief, doesn’t anybody have something better to do with their
time? By the way, while the class member may receive a 5,000 mile discount
on a frequent flyer award or up to $75 off the purchase of a ticket
(minimum ticket price of $220), the attorneys are looking to pocket fees
“not to exceed $25 million.”
When a lawyer is looking to make a fortune, it seems like the sky’s the
limit these days. Look out below!
Hey, if you’ve got a goofy lawsuit you’d like to pass on to us, simply
click
Stupid Lawsuits and Other Funny Stuff and we’ll add yours to
our ever growing list of stupid lawsuits.
And while you’re at in, why not take a few moments and check out our
growing collection of
Funny Lawyer
Quotes, Jokes and Cartoons?
It’s
Time to Wake Up and Smell the Lawyers
Book: If you haven’t read our highly acclaimed book, you’re missing out on
a load of information about America’s legal system – and a load of laughs
as well. You can read excerpts taken from the book by clicking
book
chapter summaries here.
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