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Here’s a little tidbit that should scare the hell out of every man, woman and child in America. As if there aren’t enough lawyers in our midst already, law schools continue churning out aspiring lawyers at a frightening clip. Regardless of whether you chalk up their growing numbers to America’s economic prosperity or see the increase as an alarming indicator of the litigious society in which we all live, the continuing proliferation of these weapons of mass destruction appears inevitable. It is estimated that America already houses approximately seventy percent of the world’s lawyers. SEVENTY PERCENT! Judging by the growing number of law school applications around the country, that number has nowhere to go but straight up. American law schools are busting at the seams, their classrooms as overcrowded and packed to the rafters as America’s court dockets. Economic forces of supply and demand are hard at work here. There is no shortage of demand for lawyers, with more people suing more people all of the time. This ever expanding demand for lawyers dictates that the supply of lawyers must continue to increase as well. When you stop and think about it for a moment, we’ve got nobody to blame but ourselves for this sorry mess. Without us suing the daylights out of each other, lawyers and the law school graduates would have to get a real job. No chance of that happening any time soon. So the rush to pack every available nook and cranny of every law school in America continues unabated. The allure of cashing in on the lawsuit lottery has become just too tempting. The millions and billions of dollars in legal fees that seem to be flying around like Frisbees in the park has resulted in a 17.9% increase in law school applications for the 2002-2003 school year. And to put icing on the cake, jobs for law school graduates are plentiful. Law firms around the country, flush with business, continue to aggressively court these future law school graduates to augment their ever expanding rosters of eager beaver young lawyers. In fact, many law firms elect to start this mating ritual with prospective employees while the students are still in law school, offering up positions as law clerks during the summer, hoping to lure the students to join their ranks upon graduation. The wining and dining of these future lawyers has become commonplace, with competing firms forced to up their ante for the top students every year. The seductiveness of high starting salaries and other company perks continue to drive students to the field of law. The United States already has a strangle hold on the world’s lawsuit business. Presently, over ninety percent of the world’s lawsuits are filed right here in America. In case you’re wondering, that’s a lawsuit filed every two seconds – of every minute of every hour of every day, 365 days a year. Now that’s a whole heap of trouble looking for a place to happen. Pretty soon, it’ll be a lawsuit every second. Then it will be a lawsuit every half second – and so on and so forth. With hundreds of thousands of new lawyers lurking just around the corner, hoping to strike it rich in the whirlwind lawsuit craze sweeping across our country, we’ve only begun to scratch the surface. As more and more lawyers are unleashed on society, lawsuits will continue to grow at an exponential clip and America’s court dockets will have waiting lines longer than the Department of Motor Vehicles. This new breed of money hungry lawyers have been well schooled in the fine art of chasing the big bucks. Ready, willing and able to push the litigation envelope to unimagined heights (or should I say “lows”?), these whippersnappers will undoubtedly continue to run the legal profession further into the ground – laughing all the way to the bank. Lawyers and lawsuits were once the unsavory choice of last resort for the majority of Americans, but now are front and center and dominate our daily existence. Lawyers, young and old alike, now play by a new set of self made rules that dictate that lawyers are destined to rule the world. They’re here, they’re there; in fact, they’re everywhere. With the number of lawyers multiplying like rabbits on the make, is it any small wonder that we are inundated with lawyers in every facet of our lives? What have we wrought upon ourselves? Hey, if you’ve got a goofy lawsuit you’d like to pass on to us, simply click Stupid Lawsuits and Other Funny Stuff and we’ll add yours to our ever growing list of stupid lawsuits. And while you’re at in, why not take a few moments and check out our growing collection of Funny Lawyer Quotes, Jokes and Cartoons? It’s Time to Wake Up and Smell the Lawyers Book: If you haven’t read our highly acclaimed book, you’re missing out on a load of information about America’s legal system – and a load of laughs as well. You can read excerpts taken from the book by clicking book chapter summaries here. You can sign up for our FREE newsletter by clicking subscribe in the box on the left of the page. Please tell your friends, relatives and business associates about our Lawyers Stink E-mail Newsletter. They can subscribe at our web site: www.power-of-attorneys.com (of course you can e-mail this newsletter to them!). If you would like to review past issues of our Lawyers Stink E-mail Newsletter, simply click view back issues of our newsletter. We always respect your privacy and will not share your e-mail address with anyone. If, at any time, you decide that you don’t want to receive this newsletter any more, simply click the unsubscribe link within the body of your newsletter. Thanks for reading this issue of the Lawyers Stink E-mail Newsletter and we’ll see you next month. As always, we welcome your comments and suggestions about our newsletter.
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