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Welcome to this month's edition of the Lawyers Stink Email Newsletter. If there is one thing about lawyers that chaps my rump more than anything else (and the list is disgracefully long and growing), it’s has to be the way they can sit gallantly up on their high horse and demand the truth from their opponents while, when the roles are reversed, they are quick to school their own clients in the fine art of dodging, ducking and darting around the truth. If you have ever been on the receiving end of a lawyer’s derisive, berating tongue-lashing, you know exactly what I’m talking about here. While they demand you treat them with the dignity befitting an “officer of the court”, very few lawyers will reciprocate in kind, especially if you’re the opposing party in a lawsuit. Lawyers feel it is their divine right to degrade you, deride you, disgrace you, disrespect you and demean you as they see fit. They enjoy carte blanche to accuse you of all sorts of things, the truth be damned. They can ask the most asinine, insane, rambling, incomprehensible questions and then demand succinct, sane answers from you and heaven help you if you tell them something they don’t want to hear. They’ll simply ignore your answer and turn up the heat even more - asking the same question again and again and again until you give them what they want. These miscreants can accuse you of lying when you’re telling the truth. These tricksters can make unsubstantiated claims that have no basis in fact. These rogues will attempt to fabricate events and rewrite history as they see fit. These snobbish, pompous, egotistical blowhards can rant and rave, bully and befuddle, confuse and distort all they want while you’re expected to treat them with courtesy and civility at all times. In fact, they demand it. Nice set of rules, huh? Only these overbearing, obstreperous clowns can unabashedly represent the most reprehensible, immoral, corrupt slime of the earth without ever batting an eye, yet can turn around and disparage and denigrate the nicest, most upstanding individuals with heartless ferocity. They are, in their own mind’s eye, above the law. Anyone or anything that opposes them, on the other hand, are nothing at all. These pretentious, licentious purveyors of deceit know few, if any, bounds and maintain little, if any, sense of decency or diplomacy when it comes to raking their opponents over the proverbial coals. These brash, impudent lawyers too often prevail by keeping their opponents (and quite often the judge and the jury) off balance, out of kilter and out of whack. As we covered earlier, lawyers make the rules. The damage that can be done by even just one unethical lawyer can be immense. Even one unscrupulous, dishonest lawyer is too many and there are way too many corrupt trial lawyers in this country to keep track of. The legal profession feels it is indeed above the law. Far too often state bar associations actually protect and insulate the unethical and immoral behavior of its member lawyers, often in a misguided yet well intentioned attempt to protect the reputation of the profession as a whole. Now that’s a reputation worth protecting, isn’t it? The public, as a whole, holds the legal profession in a very dim light. They don’t trust lawyers and they shouldn’t. They see lawyers as a dishonest lot by and large and how could blame them? The reckless damage being done to our prized justice system by the activities of a number of immoral and/or incompetent lawyers on a daily basis will continue to have far reaching consequences on the American way of life. The late Warren Burger, former Chief Justice of the United States Supreme Court, once said, “Seventy five to ninety percent of American trial lawyers are incompetent, dishonest - or both.” Nobody could have said it any better. Case closed. As always, here's wishing you a lawyer free day! This month's Lawyers Stink Email Newsletter is an excerpt taken from It’s Time to Wake Up and Smell the Lawyers. If you haven’t read our highly acclaimed book, you’re missing out on a load of information about America’s legal system – and a load of laughs as well.
You can also read other excerpts taken from the book by clicking book chapter summaries here or, if you like, you can pick up your copy by clicking BUY BOOK ONLINE. And while you’re at in, why not take a few moments and check out our growing collection of Funny Lawyer Quotes, Jokes and Cartoons? Hopefully you'll take a few minutes and peruse our extensive listing of stupid lawsuits by clicking Stupid Lawsuits and Other Funny Stuff. I'm sure you will agree that these stupid lawsuits could probably be classified in the following categories: the bad, the worse and you've got to be kidding me. You can sign up for our FREE newsletter by clicking subscribe in the box on the left hand side of this page. Please tell your friends, relatives and business associates about our Lawyers Stink E-mail Newsletter. They can subscribe at our web site: http://www.power-of-attorneys.com (of course you can e-mail this newsletter to them!). If you would like to review past issues of our Lawyers Stink E-mail Newsletter, simply click view back issues of our newsletter. Thanks for reading this issue of the Lawyers Stink Email Newsletter and we’ll see you next month. As always, we welcome your comments and suggestions about our newsletter.
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